This paper discusses the constitutive meanings of sexual initiation in youth, a time when, based on the choices of ideal partner and the use or non-use of condoms, we see more clearly the grammar of gender relations in this population. The methodology used was ethnographic research, carried out among 42 young people - 24 women and 18 men - between the ages of 15 and 19, from middle class families from the city of Pelotas, in the state of Rio Grande do Sul. This context highlights aspects of a traditional moral code in confrontation with the sexual initiation of men and women. We identify the perpetuation of a gender asymmetry where young women perceive themselves in a relational way, investing in the relationship, while young men seek to assert themselves as individuals through sexuality. The ficar (making out) emerges as an alternative form of affective involvement without commitment.
sexuality; subjectivity; youth